I’ve been redefining myself over the last two years, and the primary way I’ve done that is by traveling solo. What started as a 3,000-mile solo road trip up the East Coast in 2023 has exploded into a dozen over the span of two years.

Check out this list of solo baddies:

• East Coast Road Trip – 2023
• New York City – 2024
• Tampa – 2024
• Canada Road Trip – 2024
• Washington DC – 2024
• Cancun – 2024
• San Francisco – 2025
• Scandinavia – 2025
• Las Vegas – 2025
• Denver – 2025
• Carolinas Road Trip – 2025
• Dominican Republic – 2025

This article is about my trip to one of my favorite destinations, Cancun. In fact, this was my third trip there–and I value notoriety in travel. But its appeal is undeniable with its gorgeous beaches and all-inclusive resorts. It’s a happy place of mine, where I can swim through the waves, soak in the sun, and restore my inner peace.

Solo travel is hard, no doubt about it. Few of us are comfortable enough to sit with ourselves, to learn to enjoy our own company. But once you find that peace, that solitude, you’ll learn to cherish it. And, if you’re like me, not only embrace it, but seek it. I can vouch to this truth, because traveling solo is one of my superpowers:

I once heard someone say “watch out for people who eat alone in restaurants, because they can do anything.”

This was my first time going to a resort solo, and the hardest part for me was meal time. Usually, I grab a bite to eat wherever I can—most often from gas stations with grills. There’s safety in that. It’s a normal thing for folks to do. I’m even fairly comfortable sitting alone in the fast-food restaurant. But sit-down restaurants? All by my lonesome? I’ve been practicing, and I like to pretend it’s done bothering me… but if that were the case, I wouldn’t be blabbing about it here, would I?

So that’s dining alone, but add a resort factor to it? Ugh. I crossed meal paths with these people often enough that it felt like everyone there knew I was staying alone. And that’s a rare condition in these places and for these types of vacations. In fact, resorts, cruises, and other all-inclusive vacations actually charge more to solo travelers. I label that problem the ‘Single Tax.’

I was financially penalized for bringing only one body into that lodging space. I call this problem the ‘Single Tax’

People pegged me for a single traveler pretty quick in those restaurants because I was always sitting alone, meal after meal. One here or there was a coincidence, but 3 square meals a day by myself is unmistakable. I held my head high and kept a smile on my face as if I had all the confidence in the world. I reminded myself that I don’t think negative thoughts of others who are dining alone, so neither are these people thinking poorly of me.

My strategy when I travel alone is to make people wonder who I am. To make them ask, who is that girl who is so confident in her ability to be alone? Who always dresses nicely? Who keeps to herself and always has a smile on her face. Here’s a hint: That girl is just me, but she does a *fantastic* job pretending.

Each night I dressed for dinner the same as if I’d gone as a couple or with a friend. Wearing sundresses is one of my favorite things about tropical vacations. And I never pass up the opportunity to break out a pretty dress and heels.

Scrolling on a phone felt like a lonesome thing at the dinner table, so I started bringing my book with me to the dining room. Now I had something enjoyable to immerse myself in while I ate. I found my eating pace slowed, and I quit rushing to get out so quickly. I went from eating my meals in 12 minutes to enjoying a post-meal margarita in the evenings. After dinner, I’d take my laptop to the bar and work on my novel, The Unwinding. I learned to enjoy writing amid the light chaos of resort life.

Solo Travel Tip:
Bring a book, magazine, or other reading material to meals

When I travel, I try to find some new experience to try or thing to do. This time, I decided I’d scuba dive. I’d done it twice in the past, and each time, the person who went with me backed out at the last moment. That’s when it hit me–scuba diving was a perfect solo activity! Most people make faces at me when I suggest we pretend to be fish for a few hours.

I talked to the tour guide at my resort and booked a beginner’s scuba expedition. The next morning, I hailed the public bus and climbed on board for one US dollar. And when I came back that evening, I was open-water dive certified!

Here are some pics from my second visit to MUSA, the Museo Subacuático de Arte (Underwater Museum of Art) near Cancun and Isla Mujeres:

Like all things, there are downsides to traveling solo. Safety becomes a bigger concern. People are easier to pick out alone. This compounds if you are a female, aka a prey animal. I feel the most vulnerable when I’m alone in a foreign (to me) city. Ensuring my safety while traveling solo is a challenge I take seriously, and sometimes I still fail. Like that time just last week when I got roofied in the Dominican Republic (story coming soon, stay tuned).

Staying Safe Traveling Solo:

• Be aware of your surroundings
• Stick to populated areas
• Stay out of bars and nightclubs
• Keep drinks covered
• Don’t accept drinks from strangers
• Don’t wear flashy jewelry or carry designer bags

Traveling solo is something everyone should try at least once in their life. It’s going to be a wee bit uncomfortable, but it’s totally worth it. It helps a person learn to take charge of their own happiness. If you can’t be happy alone, with yourself, you won’t truly be satisfied in life. For me, traveling solo helps me unlock myself. It’s like the ultimate journaling experience.

~ Thanks for reading, Brandie

Have you ever traveled solo? How did it turn out? Let me know in the comments!